A Job Hopper? Or Just An Interesting Individual?

ever had those moments when a comment someone makes jolts you so strongly that you can only respond: “whaaaat….??? where did that come from? and what does that mean?”

i had that moment some time back at a friend’s house where i had gone for dinner. the friend’s younger brother (who is also working) asked me where i was working. i mumbled something about a magazine. he broke into a smile and said, “you know, every time i meet you, you are a in a new job – or a new industry! i’ve never met anyone like you before!” for a few seconds, i stood with my mouth open like a goldfish, and then squeaked out the above-mentioned reaction. i should have said something smart and sarcastic like, “yeah, that’s cos we meet like once in two years!” (ok, that’s not exacly smart or sarcastic, but it would have been better than the “whaaat…?” response.

and that wasn’t the first time i faced jibes from people about shifting jobs frequently. having worked in research, TV news, book publishing and magazines – all within the short span of 3 – 4 years – i guess i could call myself a jackie of all trades. except that it’s not always seen that way – one person nicknamed me a “serial job hopper” for that.

when folks ask me about why i shifted between jobs so much, i would say i was (am) still looking for something that tugs at my heart strings and makes me want to jump up every morning and run to work. is there such a job? frankly, i don’t know. i used to think that working in the media was my biggest life ambition. and i tried real hard to get my foot in – which led to a string of occurences that in some way fulfilled my desire but also left my dissatisfied and hungering for more. and like the gambler who tries his luck, i began to try mine. except that at some points, i used to look around at my more stable peers and wish i could have hung on longer, made a name for myself, created some history instead of pleasant but passable memories.

and now, i seem to have come the full circle. i look back at the past three or four years and wonder if i should have fought so hard to get my way. i remember hearing somewhere once that if a door closes, it is probably because you are not meant to go through it. hmmm…now, i am going to enter very unknown, unchartered territory in the span of the next few weeks – a new job awaits. a new career direction that may or may not be the one that will define my life from now on. there is that feeling of nervousness – almost like i were walking blindfolded through a door.

but hey, not everyone thinks its bad to have a life that is marked by so many breaks and shifts – as one very enlightened soul said in the Sunscreen song, don’t be afraid if you don’t know what to do with your life. some of the interesting people didn’t know at 22 what to do with their life. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds still don’t know!

so here’s to being one of the more interesting individuals around! 🙂

looking for my home

they say home is where the heart is. and a place that my heart belongs to is something i am yet to find. having lived away from my hometown for many years now, and adopting another country as my homestay, i sometimes feel that i dont know where my allegiances lie. coming to the place of my birth has its own charm – listening to the local chatter, exploring the huge new stores and little hole-in-the-wall shops, seeing folks who have known me since my birth. it has a touch of nostalgia, a feeling of slipping into a world that is far removed from the daily routines of a life i have left behind for a short period. but going back to the place in which i live is something i look forward to as well – the familiar skylines, the feeling of stepping back into my appartment, meeting up with a close friend and getting updated with week-old news. it is a place in which i have freedom beyond social restrictions, where i have friends with whom there is no need to take up where we left off, where life flows in a smooth rythm.

so where does my home truly lie? which one claims my loyalty and which one my love? but then again, shouldn’t both be addressed to one? and if so, which one would that be? and this is where life sometimes has a way a making of shifting the angle of the lens through which we view life. for while the sights may have been crystal clear upto a point, they may sometimes appear blurred, forcing us to take a closer look – and making us realise that deeper shifts have taken place with us.